It’s a question many women find themselves asking: What if I find out my husband is using porn? The chances are high that your husband has looked at pornography in the past, is currently using it, or will do so in the future. Barna Group’s research found that among Christian [...]
Dear Andrew, Before marriage, I was a sex addict who slept with hundreds of women and struggled terribly with porn. Porn was a struggle in the beginning of our marriage as well, but over time I have learned how to remove it from my life. I have never cheated on [...]
Here is Part 3 of this continued series of letters both to and from an honest misogynist. May it stir your heart to action against violence. This piece was written in collaboration with Rose Gwynn. Part 1 Part 2 Dear Honest Misogynist, What a journey this has been. I have learned [...]
One thing I have always struggled with is learning how to fight clean. In my family of origin, we won arguments by any means necessary: belittling, demeaning, and making the other person feel as small and as insignificant as possible in order to gain the upper hand. If that sounds [...]
Internalized sexism and patriarchy are deeply entrenched into American culture. Even the Christmas season is not immune from this plague. As we celebrate the baby Jesus’ courageous entry into our world, sexist songs and rhetoric attempt to make light of sexual entrapment and the complete disregard of female voices and [...]
Today I am coming out of the closet. No, I am not gay; I am a Christian. Now, be honest with yourself. When you hear me say those words, what comes to your mind? Take a moment and listen to those inner voices. Am I immediately anti-gay, [...]
Her poster hung from my dorm room wall. She was a model; tall, blonde, slender, attractive. I went out of my way to tell guys who visited my dorm room, “Look who I date when I’m at home”. I stood tall, proud of being the subject of envy from [...]
I recently did an interview with Northwest Family Life on the intersection of Pornography and Domestic Violence. I find this topic and conversation vital to the healing gender violence and healing masculine violence. If you are interested in this topic, please sign up for my online course What About the Men in [...]
Recent events in the news regarding sexual assault have tapped deep into fears of men who believe they will be held accountable for horrific things they did as teenagers, and women who fear they will be questioned and interrogated about some of the most painful and confusing trauma in their [...]
One of the biggest ways men can begin to change the current trend of sexual assaults, sexual harassment, and the culture of sexualizing women is by taking responsibility for their past, current, and future failures of this kind. I know this is a big ask, yet it can be done. [...]
I am pleased to share a guest post today by my copy editor & writer, Rose Gwynn. This entry is in response to my Letter to an Objectified Woman, you will hear from a woman who is stuck in an abusive relationship with her objectifying man and the war within herself [...]
Women were less than. No one would have said that out loud, but growing up in my white evangelical utopia deep in the South, we all knew it was true: men ruled the world. My presidents: always men, my pastors: always men. Most CEOs, elected officials, and anyone I [...]
Series #1 From Abuser to Advocate In record numbers women are courageously coming forward with their horrific tales of sexual abuse, harassment, assault, and violence. Wherever you turn, whether to Hollywood or Washington DC, rural areas or urban sprawl, violence and abuse have no central location; they are everywhere. The [...]
I am pleased to have therapist Matt Morrisey be the first guest blogger on my website. You can follow Matt's work here https://www.mattmorrissey.org/. Matt focuses on the healing sexual & intimacy issues with men and boys and works with the Allender Center. Boys Exposed: How Porn Traumatizes by Matt Morrisey [...]
“Our sexuality affects everything we do, and everything affects our sexuality. The same is true of our spirituality -- that which is most deeply meaningful to us. We can deny both. But denying them does not mean they are not both alive in every breath and heartbeat of life.” ― Tina [...]
Pictures tell stories, both told and untold. This photo tells thousands. There are years I go without looking into its glory, but it always whispers back for my return. At times it is just too painful to peer into. Though nearly 30 years have passed since it was taken, there [...]
With another bombshell revelation in the news this month, Harvey Weinstein has used his place of power and influence to use and abuse a countless number of women. The response has been powerful with millions of women sharing their heartbreaking courageous stories on social media with [...]
This past week I spent in Ashland, OR at the Masters Center for Transformation, facilitated by Dr. Robert Masters (http://robertmasters.com/) . It was some of the deepest psychospiritual healing work I have ever done in my life. I laughed, I yelled, I moaned, I sang, I mourned, I grieved, and [...]
The Idolatry of Sex: When Sex is God & God is Sex By: Andrew J. Bauman The category of idolatry rarely comes up when working through sexual brokenness. Yet it seems to be one of the most important categories to engage when attempting to unwind the tangles of [...]
The Onslaught of Contempt By: Andrew J. Bauman It was strange that our previous babysitter had blocked me on Facebook. What did I do? Had I offended her in some way? I was anxious as I approached her. “Jess is everything okay with us? I noticed you had blocked [...]
